Depressing Thoughts

I wouldn't blogging for a while since i will be visiting Medan located in Indonesia.
Indonesia?
Yeap, Indonesia!
Actually this a church related trip. Vocation maybe.
I'll be back soon!

ANyway, there are other things that i wanted express....

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Kinda depressing though... ...

Beware!

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Angst

Longing...

My feelings... ...Towards this place which i have once called it an un-leaveable sanctuary... ...
I'm not confused about this feeling but i can't confine it too deep into my heart.
People say ignorance is bliss, but knowing too much can also be a burden to bear... ...
Knowing the fate that my descendent will face ... ... And my family... ...
This place is no longer a sanctuary but a future Hell.

I know my dreams and ambitions can never be archive as i thought in this place.
This is a Hellish Abyss that keeps growing bigger and bigger by the day as i watch us being HUMILIATE, step on. While our GREAT ones try to reconcile.

Life of Form 6 has driven me to gain forbidden fruits of this place where i once tried to ignored it. Medias, both Bahasa Melayu and Chinese. I saw how different both sides thoughts can be even thought it's about the same news.

RAGe is silently growing in my unhappy and ignored heart...

ANGER... ...had just silent my thoughts... ...

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Today

Xiang Leng House: The Last View.

Today, i watched as my neighbours who lived opposite of my house lots moved their stuff out one by one. It was kinda weird to feel sad to watch that. (including Xiang Leng's House)
Maybe because they have being living in this neighbourhood for so long... ...
THis neighbourhood will no longer be the same.

My childhood memories can forever remain only as a memories dear to my heart.
These feeling will be forever here but the view will change from a old short looking lots of illegal houses into tall skyscapers.
I know we can no longer see the sunrise from our metal doors.

THings Change... ...

I know... ...i know ... ...

Things Change... ...

The Little Misadventure Of Cold Fly

It's been ages since i really write any article about my recent life. But today I decided to write my short adventure of getting myself home since my routine transport has been forfrieted .

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Friday
Weather : Looks kinda dark....

I had a tuition today at 6 p.m. till 7.30 p.m.
Due to the fact that i have no security of waiting bus to arrive at the time it ussually will, i decided to leave early for the bus at approximatedly...4p.m. AT that time the sky was dark as it was gonna rain, thus i brought a long big umbrella with.

Cut short of the craps i managed to arrived at the Lrt Station at 4.40 p.m. On the LRT i kept hoping that the sky would rain since it's been hazy for quite a while and I have a big umbrella by my side. And it really rained...Real heavily. My leapt for joy as i'm happy that i canuse my use umbrella while grinning those people who didn't bring it.

Wahahahahahahahaha........SUCKERs!

AFter tuition Honkiat and i headed for the LRT station, in order to get home. To our dismay, the LRT Station was CLOSED!
WHAT THE HECK?!
Crowds were gathering at the shut tight Entrance discussing, mumbling. Curiously i asked one of them.
"Erm...excuse me? WHat has happened?"
"THe LRT tracks are flooded due to heavy rain."
"What the.....?!"

Great just great!
Just when you started to have 100% faith and confidence while dependent solely on this GOVT. property, it turns around and give you a kick in your ARSE!
WHY?!
SUCKERS!

I had a few miniutes panic and struggle trying to find an alternative way to get home while not troubling my parents (since it take a long way from my home to Pasar Seni). We wanted to take a cab, but it's way too expensive and dangerous. LUckily i remembered that there's a bus head staright to home, but the problem is.....which bus stop? Considering there' too many bus stop here in this Capital.
Despite all these gibberish useless thought, we managed to find a similar looking bus stop there...we waited for our bus.
Honkiat was Lucky, Rapid KL 53 is everywhere, they kept coming while my typical Rapid KL33D is nowhere to be seen. Soon Honkiat departed leaving me with abunch of unhappy people who were suffering the same fate as mine. I waited and waited from 7.40 p.m. till 8.15p.m. During this period my parents kept calling me.

"How are you gonna come home?"
"Want me go there and fetch you?"
"Isn't the bus here yet?"
"Are you on the bus?"
"Where are you now?"

I made some 'old' friends while waiting. 2 adult friends. Both of them were finding the 33D and they don't know whch bus stop was. Maybe because they wanted more poeple to be with them and share their unfortunate stories to others thus they unconsciously made friends with me.
I always, yes always made some friends under such circumstances.

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Anyway, by 8.15 p.m. the bus finally arrived and it took me 45 minutes to get home compared with the LRT....
Reached home by 9.00 p.m.

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THis SUCKS!

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I wasted 1 hour to get to tuition and 1.30 hour to get home!

STUPID PUBLIC TRANSPORTS!!!
NOTHING HERE IS RELIABLE!
BUS! LRT!
GO TO HELL!!!

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A piece of advice before i blow myself up.
Don't ever have too much confidence on public transports even if they never fail you.
Always prepare for the worst!!!

State of Bloody Innocence

"Where choice begins, Paradise ends, innocence ends, for what is Paradise but the absence of any need to choose this action?"
~ Arthur Miller

Slow down and Think

"We are so captivated by and entangled in our subjective consciousness that we have forgotten the age-old fact that God speaks chiefly through dreams and visions."
~ Carl Jung

*Special Thanks to my sister and cousin along with their friends for willing to be my model.

Denial of Rejection

Who is the red rusted core and who is the surrounding purple-blue?

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"Malaysia — to whom does it belong? To Malaysians. But who are Malaysians? I hope I am, Mr Speaker, Sir. But sometimes, sitting in this chamber, I doubt whether I am allowed to be a Malaysian. This is the doubt that hangs over many minds, and ... once emotions are set in motion, and men pitted against men along these unspoken lines, you will have the kind of warfare that will split the nation from top to bottom and undo Malaysia."

~Lee Kuan Yew (During 1963 Singapore state elections)

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The Running Stream

"Water and air, the two essential fluids on which all life depends, have become global garbage cans."
~ Jacques Cousteau

Of Creation and Destruction

Guess what's this?
Maybe you have guess it at the 1st look, but looked closely at it's colour....it differs and pay attention, it's not just as simple as you think, just like the world which revolves around us, DO NOT be deceive by it.

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"Ignorance is bliss." - anonymous

Head of Disiplinary

SIEN SEIN SEIN
You must think so when you visit this Sien blog, reading the same old stuff nothing new ...well, sorry guys, my computer just burned down with all 'it's internal organ' in flames, thus i will not be using it for along time...

Anyway, exam just ended last week thursday, although it's only a 4-day exam i felt as though i been living a hell outta that 4 days. it's like weeks. Those exams are much harder than i thought, 3 different exams a day, while the science class only have 2 per day.
Tiring, when the results do come out, they suck big time...

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When you heard the word Disipline, what is the 1st word that pops up in ya mind?
For me well, it's 'TEACHERS' it always has something to do with those people in the school. In my life, disipline always has to do with those teachers bladdering about being good in school. Sien...
In Unit bimbingan Kaunseling, i was sudden;y being promoted as Ketua Disiplin a.k.a. Head of Disiplinary for that society. II didn't contribute anything, not even the most common thing to do if you wanna have a post in that Unit, writing a propasal. I didn't do it. And now look at me, i'm Ketua Displin. At 1st i thought it was a useless post that has nothing to do except, goyang kaki.
I was wrong, Yong Moi Moi used my post to treatened those who didn't work for the society whole-heartedly. She treaten the President that if he dosen't be more firm she's gonna use me to replace him.
What the Heck?!
Do i looked like a useful leader to her? not to mention decisive....
I know i'm not a good leader plus i'm not willing to sacrfice my schooling time for the society!
Studies is more important than that!
I wanna resign and yet those co-curiculum marks are so tempting....more than 90...even my post as Kelab Pencegahan Jenayah's Secrateary couldn't get that high!
SHit!
Life sucks man, now, Yong Moi Moi seems to notice me, the little unwilling side character, and i had tp present myself to her like everyday during recess and i'm sure late for me after recess period ortotally miss it!
Oh, such torment......

Fragment of Memories

"... and what you are left with is a premonition of the way your life will fade behind you, like a book you have read too quickly, leaving a dwindling trail of images and emotions until all you can remember is a name."

~ Bright Lights, Big City by Jay McInerney